The in-between

Going from a Med/Surg nurse to a Labor & Delivery nurse is like changing high schools in the middle of your Senior year.

Maybe I'm a bit dramatic, but it's how I feel.

In Med/Surg I had my friends who became family & had been by my side for the past 5 years. I knew them, trusted them & loved them. I had my system down & was pretty confident in my assessment skills. Now I feel like I'm fresh out of school again. I know no one, but everyone has known each other for years. I barely know that Braxton Hicks is not the name of a baby boy just born down the hall. I can carry on a conversation with an 80 year old man much easier than I can a girl my own age. I have a long ways to go, but I'm getting there. It can be a frustrating and overwhelming process.

The night shift starts next week. This is what I'm dreading most. Not so much because of the hours, but because I'm gonna miss my husband! It's so hard to get on in Labor & Delivery because no one leaves. There is a list in the break room of nurses anxiously awaiting their call to go to day shift... I'm number 14. 14!! I'm praying it doesn't last long and that I can move to the day shift quickly. God can do anything-He is fully capable. This might sound silly to say, but Chad & I really enjoy our time together! You're supposed to as husband & wife but we really have fun. We laugh a lot. It makes me sad to think that there will be days I won't even see him. For example, my first week on nights I will see him Thursday, then not again until Sunday night because of the time he leaves and I get home. We won't get to talk on the phone & tell each other about our days while he's on his way home. I won't get to beg him to go to bed at the same time as me. We won't get to watch any of our evening shows together (Bachelor Pad... Don't tell him I told you!). I know a lot of people have it worse than me. I can't imagine being in a different country than my husband for months & years at a time-props to you military wives!

"For our light & momentary troubles are achieving for us an eternal glory that far outweighs them all. So we fix our eyes not on what is seen but what is unseen. What is seen is temporary but what is unseen is eternal." 

 -2 Corinthians 4:17-18

Your daily troubles are an investment in eternity. Fix your eyes on the unseen, the eternal.

My heart feels a little weighted down. Had to to type it out. I continue to be thankful for the way the Lord has lead my life. I may plan my course but He determines my steps. And His ideas are always way better than mine. I'll be patient & will get through it (the night shift, the new friends, new processes, new assessment skills, etc). I just pray that it's quickly.

(Can I just be a farmer?!)

Quilt + Christmas + Remodel

I have a few pics that don't have anything to do with anything, but I feel the need to blog about 'em! 

So here we go.

My next quilt.... in the making! It's an adorable pattern & I love it. Blue & Brown. The pattern is from Thimble Blossoms. By the way, if you're interested in learning how to sew you have the opportunity to learn the same way I did. Mrs Gateley called lastnight and told me they have started a new sewing class at St Ann's on Tuesdays from 10-11. Let me know if you want more info. You might think it's crazy, but those lil old ladies are hilarious and so fun! And they will love you.

 

Santa came and visited Scout & Hagen!

Scout finding her stocking:

Mom & Dad trying to figure out how to use

their new iPad. Love them.

Chad surprised me with a Wii! I am pretty excited about it. Here are a few pics of Chad trying it out...

Bowling:

I just love him!

 Giving his opponent the right hook!

Hilarious.

Sweet Molly! Cheesing for the camera.

She's doing so great and growing! We are going

to halter break her this week...ahh!

And finally... the pics of the home remodel.

Chad & my dad have been working for quite a while building us some new cabinets. They've made new cabinets for every place there's a cabinet in this house: kitchen, laundry room, hallway linen, bathroom vanities and even added a few to the kitchen & bathrooms! I am sooo excited! I'm amazed by my dad's talent in his ability to build cabinets and make great use of space (which we NEED!). Chad has learned a lot from him and they have both worked really hard.

The demolition

Messy kitchen

 And where are all the things that were in the cabinets, you say?

Oh!

(This is only 1/3 of it... the rest is piled in the spare bedroom)

 This part is stressful to me, but it will be well worth it!

From this pic it looks like we could be on an episode of Hoarders!

Scout thinks it's exhausting...

Working until late in the night to install the new cabinets!

 Looks awesome! And cabinets go all the way to the top now, so

lots more space! I also like how they thought to place

the cabinets at different depths.

Probably one of the most exciting parts, a pantry

beside the fridge! Ahh!! I can't wait!

To be continued....

Christmas vacation

We got to soak in the sunshine & sand of Puerto Vallarta in the middle of December, thanks to Chad's awesome parents!

Sunset from our balcony:

I love them:

And him:

A little sample of the ice cream bar:

A Christmas tree made of poinsettias:

Whale watching:

We had a blast! It was so nice to get away and to be able to spend time with Brian & Karen. We rarely get to do that since they live so far away. It was much needed and we enjoyed every second.

Barely a Bayer

At this time last year it was a sweltering 107 degrees. How do I know? Because all of my family and friends and people that must really love me braved the heat to watch us say "I do."

It has been an incredible year. I am so thankful for Chad. He has enhanced my life for sure. I have a completely renovated house and my lawn looks awesome-none of that has anything to do with me, I am constantly encouraged, believed in, loved, spoiled! I love him so much more today than I did even a year ago, and I didn't even know that was possible. Without him these last 3 months, would have been an absolute nightmare, but with him and the Lord, we have just had a minor bump in the road.

I always knew God had a plan for my marriage. I grew up praying for my future husband on a regular basis. I still find it hard to believe I married someone who was my best friend first. It's so neat to see how God orchestrated that and how He brought us together... in His perfect timing.

The Lord has blessed us, for sure.

I love you, Chad.

Learning to Love

"Dear children,

let us not love with words or tongue,

but with actions and in truth."

1 John 3:18

It has been 4 weeks since my accident and Chad has lived out this verse. I was on my way to work on a rainy Sunday morning when an 18 year old girl carelessly ran a red light and pulled right out in front of me. Both cars were pretty mangled.

She was lucky enough to walk away with a scratch on her knee, while I suffered a 50% compression fracture at my L1 vertebrae, a fractured sternum and a 4 day stay in the hospital. I stayed for pain control and to make sure I didn't have a pericardial tear or any pulmonary contusions, which are very common with any chest wall injury. It's almost unheard of to break your sternum, it is the strongest bone in your body. And for good reason, it protects your heart. Almost always, with a sternal fracture there is some kind of chest wall injury. The Lord was protecting that part of my body.

"The LORD is my strength & my shield..."

Psalm 28:7

My mom helped me a lot in the hospital, but Chad hardly left my side. A lot of the time Chad seemed stunned, in a daze, shocked, and he didn't know what to do or say. Bless his heart. He told me later that he thought that this was the end of "me" as he knew it. He thought I would be constantly battling back pain and have to take pain medication on a daily basis. Praise the Lord for his healing powers and that so far, this has not happened.

Chad bent over backwards for me when I finally got to come home. Nights were rough, and still can be. I was unable to sleep for more than a few hours at a time. Then I had to carefully and slowly get out of bed and shuffle to the living room to sit in the recliner for a little pain control. I slept in the recliner the first two nights. Chad slept on the couch. Anytime I moved, he was up, helping me reposition or getting me a pain pill. He would say, "You need anything?" "Are you ok?" At one time he even said "I'll go buy a new couch if it will help you sleep...". He would do anything for me. I love that. Since I couldn't lay flat he spent a whole day drawing out a plan to build something out of wood to help raise one end of our bed. I never really understood it but he mentioned we would have to lay the wrong direction on the bed! Thankfully, we found Relax the Back and the nice people there helped us decide on a wedge pillow.

At a time like this I couldn't be more thankful for such an awesome, godly, soulmate and partner in life. He is perfect. He loves with all of his heart and he meets my needs. Somehow at times he knows what I need before I even ask! Like late one night my back was killing me and I needed a pain pill but didn't want to exert the effort that it took to climb out of bed (getting out of bed had become quite the process). I thought he was fast asleep, but he went and got me a pill and brought back crackers too-how did he know?! I never said a word. He's thoughtful. And he knows me. That's how.

I can't imagine going through this alone. He has helped pull me through. He makes me want to be strong. I love him with my whole heart and consider myself blessed.