Maybe staying at home is not so overrated...

It's about that time.

One more week of physical therapy and then back to work! It's a bittersweet feeling. I can not tell you how thankful I am to be feeling so much better, but now that I'm feeling better I'm {really} enjoying being home all the time.

It's funny the things you become thankful for once you lose them. And you really can't be thankful for them {until} you lose them. I was so happy the first day I was able to carry my own groceries into my house that I almost cried. I remember bending over for the first time with no pain. Sleeping through the night without having to get up and go to the recliner. I am genuinely thankful for these things and so much more.

There are a few other things (good and bad) that I don't want to forget:

• Honestly not knowing (or caring) if it's Monday or Friday (this happened A LOT).
• Getting frustrated with something and immediately thinking "Ugh-where are my running shoes?!" then remembering I can't run!
• Feeling so guilty having to sit and watch Chad do the things I should be able to do around the house.
• Loving friends who brought dinner, cleaned my house & checked on me daily.
• Meeting mom for lunch everyday.
• Watching food network all day and cooking every night.
• The precious time spent with Mrs. Gateley learning how to sew.

I'm thankful I'm able to work and help provide. I'm thankful to be able to function normally. I'm thankful I can do laundry and vacuum and cook.

I will remind myself not to assume anything about anyone. They may have a broken back and you can't even tell. (Once, mom and I went to the flower store and I had to ask a guy to put some flowers into the back of the truck for me. I felt like such a snot, but if I said "Sorry, I can't lift. I have a broken back" He'd probably look at me like I was crazy!) You never know what is going on with people, mentally or physically.

Lastly-I will never forget how God healed me. The 2nd to last appointment I had I was expecting good news. I had 6 weeks left of medical leave from my job, anymore than that and I wouldn't have a job. I had a CT scan and X-rays first, then went to see Dr Reynolds. He came into my little room with a stern look on his face. He put up the CT scan and the X-ray, side-by-side. The CT didn't look much different than the very first one-L1 was still a scrambled mess and there was {no} new bone growth. The xray....was very strange looking. Something was obviously not right. Everything he said was a jumble, I can't remember it, but he did describe my x-ray as having "concerning scoliosis".

He said I am going to need 8-12 {more} weeks off, {then} 3-4 weeks of physical therapy. What?! In my head I had just lost my job and my life had just turned upside down. Made it to the car and was so upset, crying. (This is one of the times I really wanted my running shoes)

On June 11 I was running errands with my mom. We went to the feed store in Yukon. My mom is friends with the owner, Jerri. Her pastor and his wife happened to be there. After a long conversation about scripture and healing, they prayed for me-all 3 of them-right in the middle of the feed store. I knew I was healed, right at that second.

My next appointment was July 12th-one day after my medical leave had expired and my job was no longer 'protected'. I had a CT scan again that morning then went to see Dr Reynolds. I knew I was healed, but I couldn't wait to {see} it! He comes into my little room again, same stern look on his face. "Follow me," he says. So my mom and I go back to his office. He has 3 CT scans pulled up side-by-side on his computer. The day of the accident on the right, the last one in the middle and that day's on the left. He zooms in and shows how bad the fracture was, then zooms into the CT scan on the left-today's. Complete bone growth, all the way around. Absolutely no fracture. I will never forget Dr Reynolds saying, "This is really remarkable. I attribute it to your youth the way you healed." Dr Reynolds can attribute it to whatever he wants....

Mark 11:24

"Therefore I tell you, whatever you ask for in prayer,

believe that you have received it,

and it will be yours."

Instead of 3-4 weeks of PT, I only needed 2 weeks. Luckily, my nice manager held my job for 2 extra weeks and I get to go back to doing what I love. Life is good because God is good.

Barely a Bayer

At this time last year it was a sweltering 107 degrees. How do I know? Because all of my family and friends and people that must really love me braved the heat to watch us say "I do."

It has been an incredible year. I am so thankful for Chad. He has enhanced my life for sure. I have a completely renovated house and my lawn looks awesome-none of that has anything to do with me, I am constantly encouraged, believed in, loved, spoiled! I love him so much more today than I did even a year ago, and I didn't even know that was possible. Without him these last 3 months, would have been an absolute nightmare, but with him and the Lord, we have just had a minor bump in the road.

I always knew God had a plan for my marriage. I grew up praying for my future husband on a regular basis. I still find it hard to believe I married someone who was my best friend first. It's so neat to see how God orchestrated that and how He brought us together... in His perfect timing.

The Lord has blessed us, for sure.

I love you, Chad.

Hodge Podge

Look what I bought!

It's a 1952 Singer sewing machine-all metal, in perfect

working condition with all parts and some to spare!

Mrs. Gateley is teaching me how to sew. We hit it off when I took care of her as a patient almost a year ago and we've been friends ever since. She's sharp as a tack at the age of 82 and even more witty. That's why we get along! She has really helped pass the time since I can't do much. I look forward to learning everything I can from her.

Meet some of my new babies:

Name: Duke

Birthdate: June 8, 2010

Mom: Bambi

Dad: Yadi

Name: Eli

Birthdate: June 10. 2010

Mom: Ally

(Notice Bambi looking through the nursery window).

Golden Girls

"I believe that we don't have to change friends

if we understand that friends change"

My college roommates and I all got together last night for dinner. It was the FIRST time we were all together with our HUSBANDS (well...Mary & Jason will be married in August). Here are some random pics we have taken over the past 10 years. I love these girls.

The Bayers, Rogers, Shillings & Diffendaffers!

Green Acres

Here are a few pics from our trip to Green Acres.

"Green Acres" is what we have always called my grandparents land that sits

just east of Meeker, OK.

They bought 80 acres with a little, old farm house sitting on it back in the 60's.

They don't live here but visit just about every weekend.

We've made a lot of memories going to Green Acres:

• Finding turtles for the annual Yukon turtle race
• Campfires & weanie roasts
• Learning to fish...with chicken liver and worms

• This old cellar... always creeped us out!
• Swimming in the pond
• Staying the night and eating gma's biscuits & gravy in the mornings (which she cooked on an old, pale pink stove)
• Learning to drive at 13

• 4-wheelers...and 4-wheeler accidents
• Hearing coytoes
• The tree house and tire swing

• Dalice & I talking Erin into standing in the creek and grabbing the hot wire. (Sorry Erin!)
• Seeing how many fish we could catch before breakfast
• Finding deer tracks with gpa

• Killing snakes, turtles & fish and teaching ourselves anatomy 101.
• Grandma making catfish "talk".

Those were fun times! I'm sure I left a million things out.

(All of these pics were taken on my iPhone)

Swimming with the Oldies

It's always good to get out of your 'comfort zone'. I've been giving myself a pep talk to do this for about a week and a half now. My Dr gave me the okay to swim if it didn't result in any form of pain in my back. I asked around and did a little research and found the closest pool to me is the YMCA in Bethany.

Except, I don't know how to swim.

I know how to stay afloat in water, yes. But swim? Competitively? Or for exercise? No idea. I now understand how people feel when they start to run; they're worried about their form, or their clothes or looking funny. Getting in someones way or going to slow. I can relate!

I had pictured in my mind an Olympic size pool with 4-5 serious swimmer athletes jumping off blocks, into the water and moving their arms just right so they glide across the water. I pictured them knowing when to breathe, when to keep their head in the water, how not to look goofy in goggles and how to do that flip-turn thingy at the end. I pictured it that way and when I tried to put myself in the picture I was in the way, slow, awkward and secretly being laughed at.

Yesterday I was gonna just go do it. I told Chad my fears and he said "Who cares? You're married to me and it doesn't matter what anyone else thinks." I had looked up the aquatics schedule and saw there was an "Open Lap Swim" time. Then the above picture came into mind and all of a sudden my stomach started cramping and I felt nauseous (yes-really.) So I chickened out. I looked at the schedule a little closer: 8:00am Water Walking, tomorrow morning. That's my style.

So I woke up at 7:00 am (which I haven't done in 5 weeks). I feel a little more confident that I can handle "Water Walking" but now I'm nervous about the ladies at the front desk, I hope they're nice and can't really tell how terrified I am... Of joining a YMCA?! I'm 26 years old-what is wrong with me?! I can do this!

So I walk in and met Marsha who was extremely nice and helpful. She gave me a tour, putting my mind at ease and then showed me to the locker room which led to the pool. Marsha warned me that there might be a bunch of old, naked ladies in the locker room so if I preferred I could change in the ladies' family locker room because there was no one in there. I laughed in my head and thanked her and then headed for the locker room. I got changed and went to the pool.

I didn't pay too close of attention to my surroundings. I was focused on getting underwater where me and my limited padding, tight-in-all-the-wrong-places one-piece were semi-hidden. Marsha had mentioned that the current class (Water Walking) was mostly senior citizens and I probably wouldn't be interested in that.... but the deep end was open.

So I'm swimming in the deep end. The lifeguard on duty is probably a few years younger than me. I'm sure he was wondering what the heck I was doing since I had the youngest person in the pool beat by at least 40 years. He casually mentioned that this time of day is for senior citizens and that I should come in the evening where people "..are still older, but at least they're like 30 instead of like 80". Oh, ok.

More people kept coming in. I was people watching. There was a little old man that came into the pool near me. He smiled at me with his shorts pulled up to his chest and his bright yellow flotation belt. I thought in my head "He is the cutest thing ever!" I love old people. And I'm probably just as comfortable in a pool filled with 70-80 year olds as I am with people my own age. Then I remembered how they can be incontinent at times without even knowing it and I decided it was time to go home.

But I realized... This is where I'm supposed to be. No, not necessarily at the YMCA pool during the Water Walking class (except I think now it was the Arthritis class), but working with old people, geriatrics. In my heart of hearts I'd love to be a Labor & Delivery nurse, I've always wanted to do that. And I truly hope one day I get the opportunity. But right now, for the time being, God has called me to be surrounded by wisdom-filled, grey hairs. I know some think "What is the point? Most of the time their diseases are terminal and they won't really ever get better". To me, it's more than that. It's learning from them and having a respect for what they've gone through and accomplished in life. It's giving them the best years possible for what few years they have left. It's loving, caring, listening. Being respectful and honoring. I know that most don't understand it. And I don't claim to understand it myself, but God has given me a love for this population and I'm thankful that I am where I'm supposed to be. It's a great feeling.

Learning to Love

"Dear children,

let us not love with words or tongue,

but with actions and in truth."

1 John 3:18

It has been 4 weeks since my accident and Chad has lived out this verse. I was on my way to work on a rainy Sunday morning when an 18 year old girl carelessly ran a red light and pulled right out in front of me. Both cars were pretty mangled.

She was lucky enough to walk away with a scratch on her knee, while I suffered a 50% compression fracture at my L1 vertebrae, a fractured sternum and a 4 day stay in the hospital. I stayed for pain control and to make sure I didn't have a pericardial tear or any pulmonary contusions, which are very common with any chest wall injury. It's almost unheard of to break your sternum, it is the strongest bone in your body. And for good reason, it protects your heart. Almost always, with a sternal fracture there is some kind of chest wall injury. The Lord was protecting that part of my body.

"The LORD is my strength & my shield..."

Psalm 28:7

My mom helped me a lot in the hospital, but Chad hardly left my side. A lot of the time Chad seemed stunned, in a daze, shocked, and he didn't know what to do or say. Bless his heart. He told me later that he thought that this was the end of "me" as he knew it. He thought I would be constantly battling back pain and have to take pain medication on a daily basis. Praise the Lord for his healing powers and that so far, this has not happened.

Chad bent over backwards for me when I finally got to come home. Nights were rough, and still can be. I was unable to sleep for more than a few hours at a time. Then I had to carefully and slowly get out of bed and shuffle to the living room to sit in the recliner for a little pain control. I slept in the recliner the first two nights. Chad slept on the couch. Anytime I moved, he was up, helping me reposition or getting me a pain pill. He would say, "You need anything?" "Are you ok?" At one time he even said "I'll go buy a new couch if it will help you sleep...". He would do anything for me. I love that. Since I couldn't lay flat he spent a whole day drawing out a plan to build something out of wood to help raise one end of our bed. I never really understood it but he mentioned we would have to lay the wrong direction on the bed! Thankfully, we found Relax the Back and the nice people there helped us decide on a wedge pillow.

At a time like this I couldn't be more thankful for such an awesome, godly, soulmate and partner in life. He is perfect. He loves with all of his heart and he meets my needs. Somehow at times he knows what I need before I even ask! Like late one night my back was killing me and I needed a pain pill but didn't want to exert the effort that it took to climb out of bed (getting out of bed had become quite the process). I thought he was fast asleep, but he went and got me a pill and brought back crackers too-how did he know?! I never said a word. He's thoughtful. And he knows me. That's how.

I can't imagine going through this alone. He has helped pull me through. He makes me want to be strong. I love him with my whole heart and consider myself blessed.