Swimming with the Oldies

It's always good to get out of your 'comfort zone'. I've been giving myself a pep talk to do this for about a week and a half now. My Dr gave me the okay to swim if it didn't result in any form of pain in my back. I asked around and did a little research and found the closest pool to me is the YMCA in Bethany.

Except, I don't know how to swim.

I know how to stay afloat in water, yes. But swim? Competitively? Or for exercise? No idea. I now understand how people feel when they start to run; they're worried about their form, or their clothes or looking funny. Getting in someones way or going to slow. I can relate!

I had pictured in my mind an Olympic size pool with 4-5 serious swimmer athletes jumping off blocks, into the water and moving their arms just right so they glide across the water. I pictured them knowing when to breathe, when to keep their head in the water, how not to look goofy in goggles and how to do that flip-turn thingy at the end. I pictured it that way and when I tried to put myself in the picture I was in the way, slow, awkward and secretly being laughed at.

Yesterday I was gonna just go do it. I told Chad my fears and he said "Who cares? You're married to me and it doesn't matter what anyone else thinks." I had looked up the aquatics schedule and saw there was an "Open Lap Swim" time. Then the above picture came into mind and all of a sudden my stomach started cramping and I felt nauseous (yes-really.) So I chickened out. I looked at the schedule a little closer: 8:00am Water Walking, tomorrow morning. That's my style.

So I woke up at 7:00 am (which I haven't done in 5 weeks). I feel a little more confident that I can handle "Water Walking" but now I'm nervous about the ladies at the front desk, I hope they're nice and can't really tell how terrified I am... Of joining a YMCA?! I'm 26 years old-what is wrong with me?! I can do this!

So I walk in and met Marsha who was extremely nice and helpful. She gave me a tour, putting my mind at ease and then showed me to the locker room which led to the pool. Marsha warned me that there might be a bunch of old, naked ladies in the locker room so if I preferred I could change in the ladies' family locker room because there was no one in there. I laughed in my head and thanked her and then headed for the locker room. I got changed and went to the pool.

I didn't pay too close of attention to my surroundings. I was focused on getting underwater where me and my limited padding, tight-in-all-the-wrong-places one-piece were semi-hidden. Marsha had mentioned that the current class (Water Walking) was mostly senior citizens and I probably wouldn't be interested in that.... but the deep end was open.

So I'm swimming in the deep end. The lifeguard on duty is probably a few years younger than me. I'm sure he was wondering what the heck I was doing since I had the youngest person in the pool beat by at least 40 years. He casually mentioned that this time of day is for senior citizens and that I should come in the evening where people "..are still older, but at least they're like 30 instead of like 80". Oh, ok.

More people kept coming in. I was people watching. There was a little old man that came into the pool near me. He smiled at me with his shorts pulled up to his chest and his bright yellow flotation belt. I thought in my head "He is the cutest thing ever!" I love old people. And I'm probably just as comfortable in a pool filled with 70-80 year olds as I am with people my own age. Then I remembered how they can be incontinent at times without even knowing it and I decided it was time to go home.

But I realized... This is where I'm supposed to be. No, not necessarily at the YMCA pool during the Water Walking class (except I think now it was the Arthritis class), but working with old people, geriatrics. In my heart of hearts I'd love to be a Labor & Delivery nurse, I've always wanted to do that. And I truly hope one day I get the opportunity. But right now, for the time being, God has called me to be surrounded by wisdom-filled, grey hairs. I know some think "What is the point? Most of the time their diseases are terminal and they won't really ever get better". To me, it's more than that. It's learning from them and having a respect for what they've gone through and accomplished in life. It's giving them the best years possible for what few years they have left. It's loving, caring, listening. Being respectful and honoring. I know that most don't understand it. And I don't claim to understand it myself, but God has given me a love for this population and I'm thankful that I am where I'm supposed to be. It's a great feeling.

Learning to Love

"Dear children,

let us not love with words or tongue,

but with actions and in truth."

1 John 3:18

It has been 4 weeks since my accident and Chad has lived out this verse. I was on my way to work on a rainy Sunday morning when an 18 year old girl carelessly ran a red light and pulled right out in front of me. Both cars were pretty mangled.

She was lucky enough to walk away with a scratch on her knee, while I suffered a 50% compression fracture at my L1 vertebrae, a fractured sternum and a 4 day stay in the hospital. I stayed for pain control and to make sure I didn't have a pericardial tear or any pulmonary contusions, which are very common with any chest wall injury. It's almost unheard of to break your sternum, it is the strongest bone in your body. And for good reason, it protects your heart. Almost always, with a sternal fracture there is some kind of chest wall injury. The Lord was protecting that part of my body.

"The LORD is my strength & my shield..."

Psalm 28:7

My mom helped me a lot in the hospital, but Chad hardly left my side. A lot of the time Chad seemed stunned, in a daze, shocked, and he didn't know what to do or say. Bless his heart. He told me later that he thought that this was the end of "me" as he knew it. He thought I would be constantly battling back pain and have to take pain medication on a daily basis. Praise the Lord for his healing powers and that so far, this has not happened.

Chad bent over backwards for me when I finally got to come home. Nights were rough, and still can be. I was unable to sleep for more than a few hours at a time. Then I had to carefully and slowly get out of bed and shuffle to the living room to sit in the recliner for a little pain control. I slept in the recliner the first two nights. Chad slept on the couch. Anytime I moved, he was up, helping me reposition or getting me a pain pill. He would say, "You need anything?" "Are you ok?" At one time he even said "I'll go buy a new couch if it will help you sleep...". He would do anything for me. I love that. Since I couldn't lay flat he spent a whole day drawing out a plan to build something out of wood to help raise one end of our bed. I never really understood it but he mentioned we would have to lay the wrong direction on the bed! Thankfully, we found Relax the Back and the nice people there helped us decide on a wedge pillow.

At a time like this I couldn't be more thankful for such an awesome, godly, soulmate and partner in life. He is perfect. He loves with all of his heart and he meets my needs. Somehow at times he knows what I need before I even ask! Like late one night my back was killing me and I needed a pain pill but didn't want to exert the effort that it took to climb out of bed (getting out of bed had become quite the process). I thought he was fast asleep, but he went and got me a pill and brought back crackers too-how did he know?! I never said a word. He's thoughtful. And he knows me. That's how.

I can't imagine going through this alone. He has helped pull me through. He makes me want to be strong. I love him with my whole heart and consider myself blessed.

100 days, 100 reasons

Today we have been married for 100 days. It has been so fun. Of course it was/is an adjustment too but I loove being married. It just keeps getting better. My friends make fun of me, saying this newlywed phase will pass, but I don't care. I'm enjoying every second of being a newlywed! So...to top of the cheesy, lovey-dovey-ness, here are 100 reasons why I love my husband. In no particular order:

1. He gives the best kisses!

2. He is strong in areas I am weak.

3. He always knows what to say. Or when to not say anything.

4. He opens doors for me.

5. He loves sports.

6. He is a great provider.

7. He thinks about the future and knows what we should do to prepare for it now.

8. He always asks how my day was and really listens to the answer-even if he doesn't know what I'm talking about!

9. He kisses me goodbye every morning.

10. He is loyal to me and to everyone and everything that matters to him.

11. He is a man of integrity.

12. He is great at fixing things and putting things together.

13. He makes me feel wanted and needed.

14. He surprised me when I was gone for a weekend and remodeled both of our bathrooms and the kitchen himself! And it looks amazing.

15. He is rich in all the ways that matter.

16. He was my friend first.

17. He is the best running partner ever.

18. He loves the Lord.

19. My friends love him and trust him with medical advice.

20. I love his family, my in-laws!

21. He works SO hard at everything he does.

22. He has always built me up-since day one.

23. He has a servant's heart.

24. He is the most selfless, giving person I know.

25. He is still my best friend.

26. I love him more than he'll ever know (or believe).

27. He is incredibly patient.

28. He is excellent with our money.

29. He is very wise in decision making.

30. He is laid back and gets along with everyone.

31. My family adores him.

32. He is family oriented.

33. He is the man I dreamed of...and even more that I didn't know I wanted.

34. He has helped me to know myself.

35. He is proud of me....?!

36. He respects me.

37. He believes in me and makes me believe in myself.

38. He changes my oil, tires and all that other manly stuff.

39. He loves my cooking!

40. He surprises me with little gifts.

41. He has a forgiving heart.

42. He always gives everyone the benefit of the doubt and has taught me to do the same.

43. We share our own sense of humor.

44. He makes me laugh!

45. He holds the key to my heart.

46. He is very intelligent.

47. He laughs at my jokes and my dance moves!

48. He is always making sure I have everything I need.

49. Those random text messages that just say "I love you."

50. He's a good driver...and tries to make me a good driver. hehe

51. We share the same goals, beliefs and desires for the future.

52. He is my soul mate.

53. He lets me cuddle with him in the recliner while he watches ESPN.

54. He doesn't mind going shopping with me.

55. I love being in his arms.

56. He lets me be myself.

57. He is tall!

58. He has the most beautiful blue eyes.

59. He kills spiders.

60. He always puts everyone else first.

61. He's not afraid to tell the truth when it needs to be told.

62. He can explain things to me when I don't understand.

63. He protects me in every way.

64. He builds me up telling people about me when I'm not around.

65. He makes life so much more fun.

66. I have not had to do ANY yard work in 100+ days!

67. He encourages me.

68. It was God's design for us to be together and it was in His perfect timing. I love our story.

69. He loves me just the way I am.

70. We both enjoy being outdoors and in the mountains.

71. He is a lot like my dad.

72. He is humble AND confident.

73. I love to hear him call me "Babe"

74. He loves red star burst too.

75. He always considers me when making any decision.

76. He has nice pecs...hehe

77. I'm hard to figure out but he knows me like the back of his hand.

78. We have so much fun together.

79. He will be the most amazing, loving dad ever.

80. He treats me like a princess-he takes really good care of me.

81. He's SO stinkin cute!

82. He kills moths!

83. I feel secure because I know he is devoted to me.

84. He has never complained about having to drive 1.5 hours to work everyday...and he works 12 hour shifts.

85. I love him for who he is and who he makes me.

86. He makes me a better person.

87. He gives great, warm hugs.

88. He tries really hard to understand my job.

89. He is always honest. Even when it's hard to hear or he knows I want to hear something else. I appreciate that.

90. His customers at work love him and that makes me think even more highly of him.

91. He does not waste time or money.

92. He seriously remembers everything I tell him. From when we were friends until now.

93. He always knows what I want even when I don't say anything about it.

94. He gives great back rubs.

95. His favorite thing for me to wear is a hoodie and jeans or sweatpants! Wow!

96. He always pays.

97. His blood, sweat and tears he put in to be able to afford my ring.

98. He can talk to anyone.

99. He lets me sleep on long road trips.

100. My life is enhanced because of his love for me. Loving him has taught me a lot about loving the Lord and the Lord's love for us.

I am blessed beyond measure.

And so in love.

I'm engaged!